Twas the night before school starts- humorous poem for teachers

Twas the Night Before School Starts
- Author Unknown

Twas the night before school starts
And all through the place,
Not a smile was seen
On any kids face

Our bags were all stuffed
With our notebooks brand new
And rules and pencils,
With erasers to chew

Mournfully we
All crawled into bed
Knowing too well,
The “good life” was dead.

Then Mom came in whistling
And kissed us goodnight.
With a bright cheery voice
That didn’t seem right.

The night dragged on slowly
I just couldn’t sleep
For fears that my math teacher
Would be a real creep.

Or maybe a bully
Would give me a shove,
Or even more evil things
Than I could think of.

When in from the next room
There arose such a clatter
My Mom yelled, I’M FREE
I’m free ‘til next summer!

This must be a plot
By conspiring Moms
Who just want a break
To experience “calm”

Oh, must I go through it?!
How can I go on?
I want to escape
Run off to Saigon!

Nine months is too long
To suffer through school
The classes so rough
And teachers who are cruel

Come Donald! Come Conor!
Come Henry VanStation
Come up to the board
Do your multiplication.

And Julie stop talking
And Jimmy wake up!
And Mary, right now,
Don’t do your make-up

Teachers are ever hounding
They just never quit.
You do something wrong,
They get into a fit.

And so every year,
About this time,
I lie in bed sleepless
And just moan and whine.

Until morning comes,
And I hear my Mom say,
“Good luck with your school!
And have a nice day!”

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